Making Love, Not War

Love and War’ by John & Stasi Eldredge is the book you need to read if you want to ‘make more love than war’. Yes, I already have one hundred percent of the male readership of the Dads4Kids newsletter’s attention. ‘Making love’ is high on a man’s priority list.

Seriously guys, this really is a book you need to read. Unfortunately so many marriages end up in open warfare and of course, in many cases the children are caught in the crossfire.

The wounds last a lifetime and affect several generations.

An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure’ is an old saying (that would be better translated today in grams and kilograms, but just doesn’t sound the same).

The bottom line is that most marriages become war zones for lack of preparation and planning. The happily-ever-after story is a line only used in fairy tales. As John Eldredge says in Love and War, “Marriage is fabulously hard”. I would love you to read this book, but I want to be as honest about it as I possibly can.

The publisher’s trailer says it well: “What ‘Wild at Heart’ did for men, and ‘Captivating’ did for women, ‘Love and War’ will do for married couples everywhere”.

Dan. B. Allender, author of The Wounded Heart, gives his own synopsis:

“With astonishing vulnerability that engages readers from the first page, John and Stasi Eldredge openly discuss their own marriage and the breakthroughs they have won from the challenges they’ve faced. Each talks to the reader about what he and she have learned, providing a balance between male and female perspectives that has been absent from previous books on this topic.

John and Stasi begin Love & War with an obvious confession: Marriage is fabulously hard. But beneath and behind the inevitable tensions a man and woman “locked in the same submarine” are going to have, the real battle is against the work of the Enemy, who plots and schemes to tear love apart. The Eldredge’s show how couples can win “by fighting for each other, instead of against each other.” As they say, “We live in a great love story, set in the midst of war.”

This is a book of wisdom and hope… a beautiful labor that will move your marriage to far deeper joy.”

The most popular review on the Amazon website (47 of 51 people found the following review helpful), Ben G Coleman from Texas, USA says:

I am a fan of John Eldredge’s books. I like his writing style. I like his take on the message he conveys. I like his vulnerability. I like it that he is real. And in all of these areas, this book does not disappoint. “Love & War” is their best book to date!

One of the things I like best about this book is that it stands on its own. One does not need to have read or even be familiar with any of their other books to get what John and Stasi are saying in “Love and War.”

Chapter 12, “Learning to Love”, is among my favourite parts of the book. It is so refreshing and real to have a book that does not try to boil everything down to a 7-steps-to-being-perfect-like-me approach, so prevalent today. It felt so liberating reading the Eldredge’s words without a strong dose of guilt and shame oozing out through the pages.

Many of us are so jacked up with our histories… sexually and in so many other ways. I’m glad John and Stasi tackled this, too. I particularly like it that they included some prayers to model in the Appendix, especially “A Prayer for Sexual Healing.”

This book is the real deal! No fluff. No hype. No filler. For those of us who want more… desire more… in our marriage this is now my #1 recommended read.

I like Ben’s comment, “This book is the real deal! No fluff. No hype. No filler.” It’s the realness that shines through, particularly in our unreal world.

Reality is rare and truth is often contested, and that’s why it is so important to expose yourself to truth from time to time in book form.

The truth hurts, but it also heals, and don’t we all need that healing?


Check out the Love and Marriage excerpt from ‘Love & War’ called ‘Perfect Storm’. When Love and War was released, I loved it so much I bought 10 copies of Love and War to give away. That is why I suggest that you buy a copy of Love and War for yourself, because if you are married, a perfect storm is coming your way. Buy a copy here! It is only a matter of time. It is always better to know how to survive the storm (prevention) before it hits.

Yours for weathering storms,

Warwick Marsh


[Photo by PK Pearry on Unsplash]

By |2019-09-12T21:13:53+10:00August 12th, 2019|Marriage|0 Comments

About the Author:

Warwick Marsh has been married to Alison Marsh since 1975; they have five children and nine grandchildren, and he and his wife live in Wollongong in NSW, Australia. He is a family and faith advocate, social reformer, musician, TV producer, writer and public speaker.

Warwick is a leader in the Men’s and Family Movement, and he is well-known in Australia for his advocacy for children, marriage, manhood, family, fatherhood and faith. Warwick is passionate to encourage men to be great fathers and to know the greatest Father of all. The Father in Whom “there is no shadow of turning.”

Leave A Comment