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Heavier Things

John Mayer’s music took the world by storm. Seven Grammy Awards out of a total of 19 nominations is surely  some kind of recommendation. The fact that the Beatles won 8 Grammy Awards and Simon Garfunkel won 7 gives some grounds for comparison.

I must confess to being a bit biased for two reasons. Firstly, I am a ‘Blues aficionado’ and John Mayer is a really good Blues guitarist, and secondly our family band, The Marshes, used to do a cover of one of his better known songs in our concerts in our touring days called ‘Waiting on the World to Change’.

If you listen to the radio, you would have heard of John Mayer by now. One of his songs from his album, ‘Heavier Things’ could well have been a lesson plan right out of our ‘Good to Great’ Fatherhood Mentoring course. John Mayer is an astute observer of the human condition. His song about daughters is really a heartrending story on the effects of fatherlessness and a charge for us as fathers to value our daughters and give them all the attention we possibly can because, “daughters will love like you do”.

John song is also an affirmation that children need a mother and a father. Considering that this statement will become hate speech as it has become in Canada should homosexual marriage be approved by parliament here in Australia. It is important for us to listen to the song before the thought police catch us and the song is banned from being broadcast as these TV ads were just the other day. As George Orwell said, “In a time of universal deceit – telling the truth is a revolutionary act”.

You can listen to the John Mayer’s ‘Daughters’ song in full here:

And here are the lyrics.

Daughters

I know a girl
She puts the colour inside of my world
But she’s just like a maze
Where all of the walls all continually change
And I’ve done all I can
To stand on her steps with my heart in my hands
Now I’m starting to see
Maybe it’s got nothing to do with me

Fathers, be good to your daughters
Daughters will love like you do
Girls become lovers who turn into mothers
So mothers, be good to your daughters too

Oh, you see that skin?
It’s the same she’s been standing in
Since the day she saw him walking away
Now she’s left
Cleaning up the mess he made

Fathers, be good to your daughters
Daughters will love like you do
Girls become lovers who turn into mothers
So mothers, be good to your daughters too

Boys, you can break
You’ll find out how much they can take
Boys will be strong
And boys soldier on
But boys would be gone without warmth from
A woman’s good, good heart

On behalf of every man
Looking out for every girl
You are the god and the weight of her world

Fathers, be good to your daughters
Daughters will love like you do
Girls become lovers who turn into mothers
So mothers, be good to your daughters too

It is interesting to note that many of the guys who will be doing the ‘Good to Great’ Fatherhood Mentoring course which will be starting in several places around Australia in the lead up to Father’s Day are very aware of the generational impact of fatherhood. This seems to be a prerequisite for doing the course.

I have talked with many men over the years who either have completed Good to Great or are training the Good to Great Course. All of them are deeply committed to the task of breaking the generational cycle of fatherlessness. Their comments showed a profound insight not unlike John Mayer’s of the need to move towards excellence in fathering for the sake of our children.

Love is still the most powerful force in the universe. Love heals our hearts and our bodies. Love helps our children flourish. The lack of it causes them to wither.

Dr Benjamin Salk, a family psychologist, was being interviewed on a morning TV programme. The interviewer asked him two very profound questions:
– Is everyone born with the capacity to love? He answered, ‘Yes’.
– Then why don’t we have more love in this world?

This what he said to the second question:

‘Even though we are born with the capacity to love, we need to learn how to love’.

He then turned to the camera, looked millions of viewers in the eye and said,

‘The greatest thing you parents can do for your children is to love each other’.

Lovework

John Mayer is right. ‘Fathers be good to your daughters, daughters will love like you do’, is just one of the simple facts of life.

Dads, tell each of your family members that you love them. Put a hand on their shoulder, look them in the eye and tell them, ‘I love you’.

Yours for more love
Warwick Marsh

PS: We are attending, along with others, and helping Karla Lee, run a ‘Voice For Kids’ Summit at Parliament House this coming week. Karla Lee is the founder of VOICE4KIDS www.voice4kids.com and is a child of divorce. She well knows the pain of having her parents split up and is passionate to provide a platform for children after divorce and turn the tide of broken families. We will be hearing stories from people who have experienced the pain of fatherlessness and motherlessness first hand. We will bring a full report next week. Greatly appreciate your prayers if you are able.

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